Dilemma of My LIFE

For every action taken will generate an equal opposing reaction. I asked myself why does god give me such harsh decisions to make in my life. I find myself going no where with this questions and Im really depressed about it. Such life changing decision falls down to me and I dont think I am capable of handling such pressure..

Finishing my studies I want to get a full time job in the UK to gain some work experience and mainly to clear my study loans before heading back to Malaysia. Only GOD knows the pain im going through not being able to go back so soon. On top of that, the pain was not alone for me to bear. My dear girlfriend in Malaysia is going through a roller coaster experience in life thus testing our relationship to the limit. Not knowing when i`ll be going back to her side breaks my heart. Countless time we have argued over this matter, countless time tears roled down her cheek, countless time I felt so lost, countless time I have acted calm but in fact im not. Giving her the support needed to stay strong I have to be strong

I was once reminded by my parents that in order to obtain permanent resident in Canada I would have to stay in Canada for 2 years out of 5 years. I never wanted to be PR in Canada, I never wanted to migrate, I never wanted to leave Malaysia, I never asked for this. Staying in the UK has used up 1 year, leaving me with a remaining 4 years time period in which I have to stay 2 years in Canada. My heart is divided into two. I was contemplating whether to continue job hunting in UK and then proceed back to Malaysia forgoing my PR status in Canada or should I go to Canada now and get a job fulfilling my 2 years stay. I dearly missed Malaysia so much it hurts to even think about it...

I do not want to go through such harsh decisions.. I do not want to leave my girlfriend back in Malaysia going through a really hard time with me, its not fair for her.. I do not want to dissapoint my parents my forgoing my PR status in Canada.. Im in a Dilemma. A Dilemma that haunts me over and over again making me weaker each time